Some Poetry

Disclaimer: I am including this because it accurately showed how I felt at the time not because I think it's any good

Written in January 2004

Long Road Ahead

The road that lies beyond the bend
Is mercifully hid from my sight.
It is time for the hidden me to mend
Of all I have kept locked up tight.

Little by little, things come to mind.
Memories like pictures return for me to see.
It may be only a whistle of some kind
That brings it all back to me.

( I never finished this)

The End of Hiding

I hide behind a wall of fear
Quite unable to shed a tear.
Dare I step out once more
Reaching, testing, risking that door
Leading to the terrified me?

I panic; need to run.
What have I done?

Slow down I say, it'll be okay.
Your night is turning to day.
This time help is here to stay.
They'll stay by you in the fray.

Can this really be the end? I ask
Holding together has been such a task.
Can I really let go of my mask?
It shelters me from the past.

You can let go, layer by layer.
It will take much help and prayer.
The stories of the past you can share
As you allow others to care.


Written in September 2004

My Prison

I try to protect my heart
I've locked it away in some hidden part.
I've lost the key.
I thought these walls I've been building,
Brick by brick and wall upon wall,
Would keep me safe from it all.

But there are no doors.

I'm barely alive in my fortress of fear and pain.
Who am I? Where am ? Who will find me?
My walls of protection have become my prison.
How can I be free?

There are no doors.

The walls must be broken through
But the walls have become me.
There are some cracks and missing bricks;
It is there where the pain is intense.
How can I survive the agony of these walls coming down?